August 2014
Robin Williams’ death by his own hand was a shock to all of his fans. The funny man that made everyone he came into contact with laugh and set them at ease. In the news, various clips of Robin’s work, starting with Mork and Mindy, were shown, and accolades were rightfully given to his talent.
In the first day of reporting his suicide, a news caster hinted that his suicide might have been a selfish act, especially since his daughter had just celebrated her 25th birthday.
I was taken aback by the announcer’s comment. It might be what people are thinking or were taught from an early age. If we are brought up in a religious setting with a higher power, taking our own life is not an acceptable act. It is a sign of weakness and a selfish act not rewarded in our next life.
Another side of depressive suicide is that often times it comes from a place of love for the family or care takers. In order to justify taking one’s life, the person most likely is not in their normal state of mind and may feel that they are a burden to their family, and want to spare them of the perceived trauma that lies ahead.
Suicide can also take away from all the great accomplishments a person has mastered over their lifetime. Instead of talking about the fun and happy times, people often are fixated on the “why of it” and do not understand how he or she could have done this to the family or community.
Unless you had extensive conversations about suicide, or a good bye letter was left explaining your loved one’s reason for taking his or her life, you may never know what rationale he or she used to commit suicide. What you can control now is how you celebrate and remember the life and accomplishments of your loved one.
If you find yourself faced with trying to make sense of “the suicide of a loved one” and are not finding the answers on your own, call me and let me be the one who listens unconditionally and stands for your wellbeing in the midst of great loss. Based on my own experience and training as a Grief Coach, the idea is to find balance between grieving your loss and restoring your energy and vitality for life, and in some cases, finding spirituality.
By: Diane Pratt, owner of Phoenix4LifeCoaching.com
Phoenix4LifeCoaching.LLC